Black Friday Massacre
by J. Maria
Summary: Five drabbles set on the best shopping day of the year - Black Friday.  Sequel of sorts to Hobble Gobble. Multicross.
1. Doorbusters

Series: Black Friday Massacre  
Title: Doorbusters  
Author: Jmaria  
Rating: FR-13  
Disclaimer: I own nothing, Joss owns the Buffyverse, USA owns Psych.  
Series Summary: Five Black Friday experiences, in drabble form.  
Part Summary: Waiting in lines from hell after dinnger.  
Words: 100  
Series A/N: I blame, er, credit morgyair for the idea. I should be working on other things, but no. This idea's stuck in my head.  
A/N: Continuation of Shawn's punishment in _Late._(in Hobble Gobble)

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Doorbusters

"Okay, but being late to dinner doesn't give you the right to make me your personal butt monkey," Shawn griped as Buffy gave him another glare. "Its cold out here!"

"It's Santa Barbara cold, not Vancouver cold, Shawn," his little cousin Dawn nudged him from behind. "We had to do this in Cleveland last year with a foot of snow! So quit bellyaching, cuz."

"What is so great about this sale?"

"It's a BOGO, Shawn."

"A Bogo for what? And I didn't even get any pie!" Shawn glared at Gus and Buffy as they made their plan of attack. "Traitor!"


	2. Pie for Breakfast

Series: Black Friday Massacre  
Title: Pie for Breakfast  
Author: Jmaria  
Rating: FR-13  
Disclaimer: I own nothing, Joss owns the Buffyverse, Kripke owns SPN  
Series Summary: Five Black Friday experiences, in drabble form.  
Part Summary: Revenge of the men.  
Words: 100  
Series A/N: I blame, er, credit morgyair for the idea. I should be working on other things, but no. This ideas stuck in my head.  
A/N: Um, because I cannot seem to get them out of my head. And I actually ate pie for breakfast for three days. Would have been four, but I ran out of pie.

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Pie for Breakfast

"Why am I getting _Brady Bunch_ flashbacks?" Xander shook his head at the sight of massacred pie tins, which with one eye, really made him dizzy. "Should I ask?"

"He likes his pie," Sam shrugged, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

"They took my car," Dean snapped, reaching for more. It was apple. Huh, and he'd thought he'd never eat another apple pie again. "They get no pie!"

They watched him pile in another mouthful of pie before it sunk in.

"Black Friday," Xander nodded sagely. "It's a girl thing. You do know they'll beat you up for eating the pie, right?"


	3. How Rude!

Series: Black Friday Massacre  
Title: How Rude!  
Author: Jmaria  
Rating: FR-13  
Disclaimer: I own nothing, Joss owns the Buffyverse, Fox owns Bones.  
Series Summary: Five Black Friday experiences, in drabble form.  
Part Summary:  
Words: 130  
Series A/N: I blame, er, credit morgyair for the idea. I should be working on other things, but no. This ideas stuck in my head.  
A/N: Because people who shop on Black Friday are crack heads. I should know, I'm actually one of them (but then I also have to work during it, so I can't really help it).

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How Rude!

"I don't get it," Dr. Temperance Brennan shook her head as she watched Angela and the girl who insisted she knew Booth dodge around the other shoppers.

"Shopping is a bonding experience, Bones," Seeley rubbed at his sleep heavy eyes.

"No, I get that! It's an anthropological standard for females of an age to participate in bonding experiences. I don't see how rising well before dawn to jockey for half-price goods correlates to Thanksgiving - hey!"

Brennan felt someone jerking the stuffed pig from her hands, and turned to see a little old woman pulling at the toy.

"Piss or get off the pot, sugar!" the grandmother huffed, scurrying away with her pig.

"What happened?" Dawn asked as she and Angela pushed their way back to Booth and Brennan.

"That woman took my pig!"


	4. That Was Easy

Series: Black Friday Massacre  
Title: That Was Easy.  
Author: Jmaria  
Rating: FR-13  
Disclaimer: I own nothing, Joss owns the Buffyverse, J.K. owns the Potterverse.  
Series Summary: Five Black Friday experiences, in drabble form.  
Part Summary:  
Words: 168  
Series A/N: I blame, er, credit morgyair for the idea. I should be working on other things, but no. This ideas stuck in my head.  
A/N: Apparently, I'm just blatantly stealing the title from Staples. Cause I can.

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That Was Easy

Vi was smiling up at him like he was a god. And he was rather enjoying it. She wrapped her arms around his waist and gave him a sexy little grin, her eyes half-hidden beneath her lashes.

"Do it again," came out in a husky whisper as he rushed to comply.

"Oh, my god, she's got him completely snookered," Dawn giggled as she and Kit rushed forward to take advantage of this golden opportunity.

"Shut up, we're reaping here, Summers! Don't snap him out of it! How often is he this nice?"

Of course, he knew his girlfriend was doing this for her stupid muggle friends. Knowing that a very grateful Vi would make it up to him later made it worth the effort of Draco freezing three dozen muggles so the girls could snatch up the hot items. He'd be a bit pissed later, when he realized they used his money to fund the shopping spree. Right now, he was a god. Later he'd play the devil.


	5. Bargain Bin

Series: Black Friday Massacre  
Title: Bargain Bin  
Author: Jmaria  
Rating: FR-13  
Disclaimer: I own nothing, Joss owns the Buffyverse, CBS owns NCIS.  
Series Summary: Five Black Friday experiences, in drabble form.  
Part Summary: Bonus prize! Eww.  
Words: 178  
Series A/N: I blame, er, credit morgyair for the idea. I should be working on other things, but no. This ideas stuck in my head.  
A/N: Okay, a bit darker than the first four. Can't help it.

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Bargain Bin

The brunette was getting huffy. The blonde looked bored. McGee looked nervous.

"What do we got, Ducky," Gibbs strode up, coffee in hand.

"A bonus prize in the bargain bin," the brunette quipped, speaking before Ducky could.

"Dawn," the blonde warned.

"McGee, what are they doing on my crime scene?" Gibbs snapped, giving them an irritated glance.

_"We_ discovered the body of _your_ marine," Dawn crossed her arms defensively, sick of not being taken seriously.

"Dawn!" the blonde hissed. "That's Tim's boss!"

"Duh, I know, Buffy," Dawn rolled her eyes as only an exasperated little sister could. "I can read the big NCIS on his hat."

"Then stop being a brat!"

"Hey, you're not the one who thought she was reaching for a pair of five dollar jeans and got a dead guy's leg instead! I've got every right to be a brat!"

"McGee! Who are they?" Gibbs snapped, stopping Buffy from whatever she was about to say.

"Uh, Buffy and Dawn Summers," McGee shifted uncomfortably, aware that the whole team was now looking at him. "My cousins."


End file.
